Q #11: How would you, as a pastor, advise someone about the final state of a person who expressed faith in Christ but committed suicide?
A: This is a difficult question to answer, but it is of particular interest to me, as the first funeral I presided over as a 22 year-old minister was that of a suicide. The question is difficult, especially in light of the history of Christianity. Dating all the way back to St. Augustine, the Roman Catholic Church condemned suicide as a sin that leads to eternity in hell. This has become the understanding of most Christians ever since.
It's interesting that the Church took this kind of approach toward suicide, given the fact that there are seven suicides in the Bible and little is said about the eternal destiny of those who committed suicide with the exception of Judas.
It is also a relevant question for today, as, recently, a number of prominent Christians have gone through a public grieving after their own children have committed suicide.
I think the presumption that someone who has committed suicide has definitely been condemned to an eternity in hell is wrong because it not only presumes things that are not revealed in scripture, but it claims a bit too much clarity about who goes to hell and why. To tell a family who has lost someone to suicide that their loved one is most certainly lost for eternity in the anguish and pain of hell is to add an unimaginable burden of loss on top of a grief that is already so impenetrably dark that those left behind find hope elusive anyway.
Instead, I point people to the fact that God is always right in his judgments, and that God's mercy is stronger than his anger (Jonah 4:2). Often, mental illness is connected to a person's suicide. God will decide where a person stands for eternity, and in heaven, in the light of God's justice, we will have peace with it. Therefore, we can have peace with God's justice now and recognize that he loves, forgives and has grace toward his own. Nothing can separate from the love of God in Christ, not even death (Romans 8:31-39).
This being said, I would never want to presume the other way. I would never advise anyone that suicide is a sin that is easily overcome or that suicide is a way to solve any problem. Thoughts of suicide need to be discussed with someone who not only loves us, but who will help us to find the hope that is found in Christ and in the scriptures.
The important thing to recognize for those who have suffered the loss of someone we love who has committed suicide is to be at peace with the ambiguity of trusting a God who is always both fair and just. That's where peace is found. With the God who lost his own Son and understands personally the devastation that comes with losing one you love to evil. That same God is able to overcome death with life and resurrection, to make all things right.
If you are reading this and considering suicide, please click here and contact someone there for help.
For more information on the sanctity of life and suicide from a Christian point of view, click here.
Check out more posts from the 31 Questions series on subjects as varied as marijuana, infidelity, 666, the eternal destiny of children who die, dealing with discouragement, cremation, co-habitation, baptism and even speaking in tongues!